Haven't really had much to talk to myself about but I am feeling a little home sick today. There's a really big 'Stag & Doe' party in my old village for a young man that I knew a long time ago. I think he was around 8 or 9 when I took my first child to her new babysitter for the first time. She was not quite 4 months old and I was returning to work. A very sad and difficult day for me for sure. It was dark and snowing heavily and I had to walk to the other side of the village. I Cried the whole way there thinking my poor child was going to freeze to death. Finally got there, brushed the snow off her stroller and peeked inside. She was comfortable, warm and sound to sleep. I just cried that much harder. Well there were a couple of other kids there. Ian, the older brother and Margie not quite 2. From that moment on a wonderful friendship began and still flourishes today between the kids ( Adults nowO. Well, tonight is the stag and many people from both the village and city are going. They've even chartered busses to bring in the people from the City and take them home afterwards. I was very close to this family once upon a time. Both families really. But when I left the village so many years ago my connections slowly faded. I always dropped in whenever visisting the village but haven't been there in 3-4 years now. Everyone I once knew well will be there and without any doubt I'm sure it will be lots of laughs and merryment. It's when I hear of these types of celebrations I can't help myself from being a little lonely and jealous. So, I've tried to take my mind off it by trying to do something else. Asked my brother and his wife to go out to a movie but their lives are so scheduledthat something spontaneous just doesn't work for them. I should known better. Not really a big deal. I would have loved going with my brother but not so much with his wife anyway. Hopefully I'll hearabout the stag tomorrow from my daugher. I'm sure my son will be there as well. My Ex wanted to go but had a prior Firefighter committment...These kinds of situations don't come up all that often but when they do it hurts. Notas much as it once did but I still feel it. Oh well, such is life and we must deal with lifes choices both good and bad. I have to say that once upon a time I would be devasted and probably slip into a bit of a depression but I have much better perspective these days so it is more of a disappointment than anything else.
Tomorrows another day with other things to think about. I happy and quite content this drizzily cold evening. I'm still thinking about maybe getting an older cat to keep me company and to love and cuddle with. Don't know what to do....keep thinking I guess and looking at all the beautiful pictures of kittens/cats on facebook.........
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