Mon to Fri, April 24/15

Today was a relatively good day. I'm feeling better and one of my oldest friends, Marylou, came this afternoon. We headed out for a bit of shopping. She brought her 91yr old Mothers chair with just wheels and foot rests on it so she could push me around. I've used this chair in the past when we've gone downtown to the Market area and went to the National Gallery in the past. It is a wonderful tool to have and I want to buy one of my own. They cost about $300 which I don`t have but maybe someday Her sister, a nurse, will be looking to see if she might be able to find a used one I could afford. We`ll just have to wait and see what comes up. I may try to find something on KIJII or whatever it`s called. Bottom line this visit and outing was so good for my soul and the hugs we gave each other were loving and so very much needed. This woman has been with me through thick and thin for over 35yrs regardless of difficult times we sometimes found ourselves experiencing with one another. We have always found our way back to our friendship. It`s funny really because we are diabolicly so very defferent. I guess it`s really true that opposites do attract one another I completed a letter to my former Councillor Margo in Owen Sound. I wanted and needed to tell her how things have been with me during this transition so I sat down with my Computer on my lab and wrote it out. Kris proof read it correcting spelling and grammar mistake last I then copied and pasted it to Sues FB page and she will take a copy of it to hand over to Margo at her next appointment. This is something I've wanted to do for a long time and am very proud and happy with myself for getting it done. Tuesday was a wonderfully productive day for me. I awoke happy and energized. MaryLou's visit yesterday really stuck with me. A simple visit from a wonderful friend was all it took to bring me up and out of my funk. This happy feeling was still within my soul this morning and I attacked the day by working on a number of things needing my immediate attention. I got all my laundry done and put away before noon, Updated some files and printed them off, talked to my parents and some friends in Owen Sound. Finally garbaged a lot of pictures I was holding onto for too long. Generally a good and wonderfully happy day until a simple task I needed to do became too challenging and difficult to accomplish. I wrote in a neat card I got for Mom for Mothers day. I got the address and wrote it down. I really made a mess of my note to mom, she probably won'[t be able to read my chicken scatch so took the card and envelope down to reception and that where things got bad for me. Ed so nicely found mom's address via the internet, came down to my room, wrote it on the envelope, made sure the stamp was affixed to the envelope then took it to the mail box down in the loby. I'm so grateful to all that helped me get through this frustrating exercise and trauma. I calmed down had a nice dinner then sat with a couple of seniors who are in the latter running stages of their Alzheimer's so the receptionist could go get her dinner then came back to my room and hammered my Hat I decorated earlier on my door so it will show from the Hallway above my Nmae plate. It actually looks quite nice and I like it quite a bit. Is was cold and raining most of this Wednesday but I was OK with this. Still unable to get out cruising on my Scooter I choose to embrace whatever the day had to offer from inside the Home. A couple of things happened that caused me concern. The first was interacting with Betty. A woman fast approaching the total grip of Alzheimer's I sat with her for several hours throughout the day. Her mind was rapidly going through rapid scary things so I tried my best to just go with the flow of her moods. She rapidly and abruptly go from friendly to hatred to all consuming tears to yelling and swearing and everything else in between and all very loudly and fiercely. So very hard and sad to watch her. All these emotions were very palatable. I'm getting yet another glimpse, one of many glimpses I had over the years into what happens to healthy, happy souls. So sad, very sad to witness in so many watching them be robbed of their lives and dignities. Betty spent a lot of yesterday feeling that everyone was conspiring to harm her and lie to her, myself included. As the day wore on she began talking a lot about her mother and looking for her to come to her and hug her. She was talking as though her mother was alive still and she really wanted her. Betty is in her late 80's I believe but she is remembering her oldest memories which are the last to go. Staff took her cane away last week because she started angrily swinging it around at people. I wonder what tomorrow will bring for her and her mind. I will again spend as much time with her as she'll let me because when she is calm and happy we'll chat and chat about God only know what as it is really a moment to moment interaction. I called my mom close to dinner time and she informed me that Dad has been getting worse and is in a lot of pain in his abdomen and bowels. He will be taken to the Hospital first thing tomorrow morning to undergo yet another battery of tests to find out what's going on with him. Dad has suffered so much over the years and one of these times his body will give up completely fighting to survive. I only pray that one of these days the Universe will transition his soul into peace. He deserves to have his pain taken away. My Mom has suffered her own pains for years as has my Dad. It's been a long and very difficult journey through life for my Dad and he has paid his,dues. I know this is not the way I should be talking about my Father but how much more must this man suffer and struggle to stay alive!!! Well Dad got home from hospital Emerg around 3pm with of course more meds to help relieve his situation and pain. He has an appointment booked with the Internest next week some time which I'm sure there will be more invasive tests and blood test done again. Just another of many scares for this family and I'm sure there will be many many more to come Well my Dad is home and safe this time round. I'm happy that it appears to not be something serious but he will be seeing an Internist next Thursday so we'll see what comes of that. I also had a great chat with my friend in the states last night covering all kinds of different things. It was nice and a fun way to end the day leisurely chatting with her. I am so jealous of the great almost summer like weather she is experiencing in her city. She was even at a work picnic after work last night enjoying the sun, the warmth and the happiness and joy of all her new workmates. She had a blast she was telling me. Shitty chilly rainy day here again today. Egads this is frustrating everybody her at the home. I've really cleared out all things that no longer want nor need. What an energetic boosting to my Soul. I'm so glad I persevered with this task and will reap the benefits this brings to my soul and well being. Not much is happening with me today but I did manage to talk briefly with Charlotte, one of my oldest and dearest friends. I caught her at work. She has been so incredibly busy with the business of selling homes, moving a daughter way past London Ontario and writing, producing and acting in a play that will be opening on May 8th. My daughter has agreed to take me there for the matinee show on Sunday May 10th. I'm excited about this and hope my Daughter will enjoy it too. Spending the rest of this day puttering around my Apartment and chatting it up with some of the Seniors I enjoy talking with. As for gratitude I am so full of it for Mom and Dad being in my life still. Gratitude for Glen who stayed right with Dad during the difficult day he had at the hospital yesterday. Grateful for Kris taking the time to engage in good conversations with me once again and always grateful to have my kids in my life as they can be for me. Wonderful people all and always.