Oh wow....It seems the more I bring up the more I need to work out. Although this experience has been both wonderful and freeing it has also been somewhat mentally and physically exhausting. Two diametrically opposing forces pushing/pulling against each other. It is so miraculously significant in that I, for once in my life, not only am I just going through the motions but am really learning and experiencing the effects of doing so. Something I so actively avoided doing and allowing myself to do in all of my past. Just this in and of itself is a true miracle for me. The gifts I have been receiving can not be compared What do you take from that bit of info ? Did I deliberately forget about it. I had somehow got in my thoughts that the apt wasn't until tomorrow even though I had reminders posted everywhere in my apt and they had called me on Friday to remind me to bring all my meds with me. I just don't know what happed. But I quickly rescheduled but couldn't get another apt until Nov.5th but at least it's only a few weeks away. I can work with this and actually really prepare myself to talk about everything it need and mush talk about.
Another issue I must deal with is the anxiety I get when I begin to feel overwhelmed as I had felt so heavily the other day. I may have even touched on this in an earlier blog but can't really remember if I did or not. So I'm going to talk about it a little here becase someone gave me really good pointers on how to overcome this feeling and actually unparalize myself into the action that I need to do to keep moving forward. Here how it went -
she imediately told me to take a few cleansing deep breaths first and foremost. The to write down a list of everything I feel I need to do to achieve getting to where I want to be. Then prioritize the list in order of sequence. Then do one item at a time to the completion of all the items. So that I can actually feel the elation of doing something important to the finish. I thought this was the direction I needed and immediately completed this prioritize list. Once done my desire to get moving was really fired up within me. I'm so proud of myself now instead of being so bummed with myself because this little nudge from someone with whom I respect dearly got bumped me back up and back on the path that I had been on. I'm happy and joyous about this because of the importance I put on it. Thankyou friend for guiding me back to where I really want to be with my blogging experences. You're simply the best. You surely know and understand what is needed and how to gently guide. Again thankyou!
I'm most certainly not finished with these subjects and will visit them again in the near future but I wanted to keep it in the forefront because they are so intertwined not just with each other but several other issues I'm still working on.....Bogging is so helping me deal with and effectively handle everything that going on both with my internal self and my external self. These are all the stepping stones on my journey to fuse my separate selves into one whole self. Your getting there deana. The light I am seeing way at the end of the tunnel is definitly getting ever so brighter with each and every discussion we are embarking on....Way to go kiddo.....Way to go...I so impressed with the work
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